The Ten Cheating Commandments

There's rules to every game, even games that might not be worth playing like cheating. However, if you must cheat do it right and keep it tight. Here are the Ten Cheating Commandments:

I Thou Shall Only Cheat in My Free Time
One should not set aside time to cheat, cheating should only be done in free time. If you manage to neglect spending time with your partner to cheat you might as well end it. Your boo always comes before side pu$$y or d!ck. Cheating is the extracurricular, not the curriculum.


II Thou Shall Only Tell Non-Consequence Lies
A non-consequence lie is a lie that bears no negative or consequence to the receiver. Here's an example, Her: "Bae, are you excited to meet my parents?" Him: "I can't wait." What a consequence lie, Her: "Do you have unprotected sex with other people?" Him: "Hell naw, I can't believe you would ask me some sh!t like that." See when you lie about things like that and your love one comes down with something they could have only caught from you. You look stupid and forfeit their choice to protect themselves, the consequence is whatever the potential repercussions are from your lie.


III Thou Shall Never Take the Side Piece to His/Her Place
If you and your lover share a crib, studio, park bench, or whatever and you bring the side piece over there your f^cking up. Never sh!t where you sleep. Don't blow your spot up. What happens if your side piece is a psycho and ruins your relationship? Aw, you didn't think about that...figures.


IV Thou Shall Not Have Unprotected Sex Outside of the Relationship
This is self-explanatory. Do not take away someone right to choose against your brazen actions outside of you alls relationship, because you lie.


V Thou Shall Never Get the Side Piece Pregnant or Get Pregnant by the Side Piece
If you pop off your side thang, you're a loser. Point. Blank. Period. You might as well end your relationship the moment you get that news. Say goodbye to the good thang on the side of a great relationship and hello to baby mama drama.


VI Thou Shall Never Splurge on a Side Piece
You don't spend money on side pu$$y or d!ck, that's a no no. The last thing you need is another responsibility, don't be a simp. One of the first rules of cheating is no paper trail.


VII Thou Shall Never Discuss Your Partner with a Side Piece
How can you be as disrespectful as you can be? Well discuss your partner with the side piece, that's worthless behavior. Anything you tell to your side piece is on a Sh!t U Need 2 Know basis. You don't lay down discussing all your relationship problems with a f^ck. If you need to talk, get a shrink. Besides loose lips, sink ships. So shut the f^ck up and get back to cheating.


VIII Thou Shall Never Let the Side Piece Spend the Night
Unless the person your cheating with is homeless or happens to live in the same place as you and your boo like you're f^cking your stepdaughter or her mama, than tell them to kick rocks. There's no cuddling and footsie going on, cheaters don't f^cking cuddle. Cheaters f^ck. Clean up and get on with life.


IX Thou Shall Never Get Emotionally Attached to the Side Piece
Develop feelings if you want to and that will be the beginning of the end. You don't love these hoes. Later this week, I will tell you the Art of Jugging which is having fun and dating. Some say there's a new STD floating around called "feelings", hold your breathe til you turn purple.


X Thou Shall Never Go the Extra Mile to Please the Side Piece
If pleasing your side piece doesn't come innately, then f^ck 'em. Why please or bend over backwards for a side piece? That's what relationships are for. You shouldn't have to stress over extra, extra is supposed to relieve stress. All of your problem solving skills should be devoted to the one person that truly has your heart.

Do you agree with the Ten Cheating Commandments? Did I miss any? Have you ever broken any of these rules? Was there a repercussion for breaking any of these rules? Do I post enough for you? Is there anyway you think I can improve theSUNK.com? 

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