And Other Coonery: Women Killed Him, I Just Hid the Body, Chivalry
If women want an egalitarian society, than promoting and advocating chivalry encourages us to be sexist to you. Small acts like giving my seat, throwing my coat down on a puddle of water, letting you get the first slice of pizza, etc- create attitudes for a whole gender and a whole society. These acts encourage men to be misogynistic. When you advocate for practices or customs formed in a time period and country(America) when there was no such thing as an independent woman, it will definitely coincide with modern reasonable and egalitarian requests.
Conversely, chivalrous acts are romantic endeavors or investments that set the tone for the beginning of a flourishing relationship. Things you do when you have an interest in a woman. Chivalry is and are a series of acts granted to women that have garnered your attention.
Standing up for the elderly or the mothers of our future children is a must. However, standing for any random woman I do not agree with. Your a woman just as able bodied as myself, why should I give you my seat? People must be able to differentiate between chivalry and romance. A woman that wants or believes she deserves chivalry from a man that she doesn't know is the female equivalent of thirst.
There is nothing wrong with being chivalrous to a woman you love or are courting, but every woman does not deserve the privilege. She deserves to be treated like a humanbeing, just as you should be treated like a humanbeing and not penalized for being a progressive man.
Who killed "Chivalry"? Do you believe you deserve chivalry just because you are a woman? Do you disagree? Where any of my points valid? Is chivalry a romantic act?
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Labels: black, chivalry, love, Men, misogyny, relationships, romanticism, sexist, today, view, women
12 Comments:
Very rarely do I disagree with you; rarely cuz you have been blessed with a wisdom beyond the ages. However, this time...this one time. I totally disagree with you. Totally.
Yes, women want to be treated like equals and desire a society of equality and as a consequence have sacrificed chivalry; but the equality we seek is intellectual not physical. And that’s what men don’t get.
See women know they’re the weaker sex…physically. And we love being the weaker sex…physically. We love that a man will hold an umbrella for us in the rain, open car doors, carry our bags, and treat us like we’re dainty, and quaint, and cute. We love that a man will stand up for our honor or make sure we made it home safely. We love that we can tell a man a problem and know that we know that we know he’ll make it all ok. We love that a strange man will change a tire for us when it’s flat or help us carry our bags to the car.
But what we don’t like is being treated like we’re stupid, like our opinions don’t matter, like our feelings don’t count. We don’t like being lied to, we don’t like being taken advantage of; we don’t like being treated like another notch on a belt. We don’t like the idea of you slappin hands with your boys and talkin sh^t about us-any of us. And so we wanted, we needed that to stop and in the process of stopping that, we sacrificed that which we loved, the chivalry. We sacrificed it, we didn’t give it away.
And to only be chivalrous to the woman you’re courting? Not a good idea cuz we notice that. You’ll hold the door for me but let it slam in the face of other women? Not only is that common but embarrassing. We would rather you stand there and hold the door for ten women than slam it in the face of one. There’s such a thing as sisterhood and it is no respecter of color or age. Women are sisters first and we notice when a man treats our sisters with disrespect. You think you’re impressing me cuz you held the door for me-hold it for a completely unknown woman and watch me be impressed. Don’t treat me differently than you would any other woman when it comes to chivalry.
Chivalry is not romance. It is a sign of a man’s understanding of women in general. A chivalrous man values women because they are women. Romance differs- like in after you’ve held the door for the first 10 women, you give me the rose. All women are special but I’m the one you love…that’s romance. That’s true romance, that’s not chivalry.
I’m gonna stop right here for now. I think you get it. You’re smart like that. But you are still a man….so if you don’t get it, lemme know! I ‘d be more than willing to break it down!
@AlltheSingleLadies
The reason chivalry has died is because women no longer want to admit that they are weaker than men(physically), as you can recall in the first paragraph I gave a brief explanation through dialogue of why a man says he isn't needed anymore.
My mother is a traditional woman and she admits that she loves chivalry. And expects to get her door opened, chair pulled out, etc. Those women will receive chivalry. The women who don't admit to the intellectual and physical differences between men and women wont. The Hallway aint raising up and getting out of his seat for any hoodrat just because she was born with a vagina. I will judge them based on the things I hear them say and how they act at that specific time.
I would like to argue that women are not as intellectually advantaged as men are, but I'll save that for another time.
But I love your response, it was concise and coherent. However, dont take the post too literal. I open the door for men and women alike and this was also a free writet. A brian teaser of sorts. But I agree with you as well
Hmmmm. I for one don't believe chivalry is dead because I am on the receiving end of it ALL. THE. TIME. I had things like doors open and held open while I go in first although they were in front of me, I had men help me push my stalled car out of the road after I ran out of gas and same man goes to gas station to get me some gas, I've had men help me put heavy items (case of water) into the truck of my car. No I am not a senior citizen either. *lol* I am in my early to mid 30's
So this whole chivalry is dead bizness is utter BS to me although I have heard women complain and all I can do is "SHake My Head" because I am a flirt and I have no problem batting my eyelashes and playing the damsel in distress and signaling for help from a able bodied male as well.
@Anon1/24 Thats technically romanticism because the guy is most likely trying to get some cheeks, especially if you're flirting with him and you're somewhat attractive. He isnt doing it just because youre a woman, youre a woman that he wants to gain something from.
I think we could argue and debate this issue for hours! It's fun...I love when someone's wrong and don't know it(LOL)! With all that being said...
Let's agree to disagree on the following points:
Women know that they are physically weaker
Women admit that they are physically weaker.
Women love chivalrous acts-even the hoodrats who probably don't even know what it is cuz they ain't been taught. Give up your seat and teach 'em something.
What I agree with is your answer to Anon!That's what killed chivalry-men doin what they do for the sole purpose of gettin the booty. We caught on to that one. And we no longer trusted the chivalrous acts.
I can't wait for the intellectually unequal post! That's gonna be a helluva good time!
Sooo what you saying is that chivalry is dead unless he's trying to beat??!! O__o.
Oh well.... *shrug*
By the way, love the booty shorts and t! How do I buy them? Paypal?
@AlltheSingleLadies
Once I figure it out I will definitely tell you exactly how to cop some..I will probably use big cartel
Every woman does not deserve chivalry, but I give it to them regardless.
I would rather err on the side of courtesy.
Too much meanness in this world already.
@ Allthesingleladies:
"but the equality we seek is intellectual not physical"
So men still must adhere to traditional norms even though women have surpassed men in academia and in many cases, income?
Also, if men are expected to be chivalrous, would it be fair of them to expect you to cook, clean and pleasure them? After all, what's good for the goose....
Allthesingleladies, like most women, are dependent, little girls who expect tradition when it's convenient and equality when it's convenient.
Thank god chivalry is dying. Make no mistake, it is on its way out.
Now get a job or make me a sandwich.
Today is February 7 and I just read this response comment...directed towards me. It's absolutely hilarious!! I got the job, are you makin the sandwiches now?
Don't be happy that chivalry is dying or on it's way out! Chivalry is biblical! Anything God ordained should not be laid to rest! What's He say: "Husbands love your wives; wives serve your husbands." That's chivalry. When a man loves his woman; truly loves his woman, she will make him a sandwich and any damn other thing he wants! Woman love when a man loves them...absolutely love it. Hold the door, pull out the chair, give up the seat...watch your woman feel special and figure out what she needs to do for you to reciprocate those wonderful feelings and watch other women melt and envy the woman whose man is displaying these acts.
And you quoting me and all? That's a great compliment....women do seek intellectual equality! However I didn't say exact equality. My intellectual gifts do not have to be exactly the same as yours to be considered equal. But don't treat me like I'm stupid because my concepts are abstract and yours are precise. What I bring to the table intellectually is equally important. That's the respect that we seek. I never (and I think all women feel this way) want a man to assume that I believe I am his physical equal but mentally we are on the same page.
Chivalry deals with the physical only not the intellectual or spiritual. Treat me like the weaker sex physically and I will respond and make the best damn sandwich you ever had. Treat me like I'm the village idiot, and you ain't getting nothing but nasty attitude!
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