Somebody's Baby: The Cougar Crusher

We had to be having a heatwave in Chicago this particular week. Every Monday I make my usual run to Unique's Thrift store on 32 & Halsted. I was there trying to find an all white outfit for this white party at the Mason's Lodge. I was in the men's suit aisle when this woman ask me how she looked in this sombrero hat she was trying on, I said ,"Its all crunched up on your head like a fucking tortilla." She said, "No, it's not it looks like I was riding a horse." I replied, "More like you got trampled by some horses." We laughed in unison. The conversation died down and she walked off.
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Just Because You Give It to Me Now

Women believe "just because you give it up now, you're a hoe." Who said that women didn't like to f^ck? We know you like to have sex, explore yourself, and please us. I'll let you in on a few secrets that will inevitably make any relationship you have with a man more prosperous. Women try to figure out men, but rummaging through the male psyche is like trying to pick a pubic hair out a pair of wool underwear. So, without further ado.
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