Girl, Let Me Tell You: How She Determines If You Have Good D

This blog is for the fellas that don't know how women determine good and bad d!ck. Some of you guys are walking around here completely oblivious to the wack d!ck your bragging about, while your girl is elsewhere admiring someone else's parts. Life would be so much easier if you knew how to classify certain things, that's why theSUNK is here. The same site that told your girl how to determine if she had a "Pretty P^ssy" surveyed ladies on the criteria for Good D... So pop the top:

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The Fellatio Diaries: Women Like to Give Oral Entry IX

Dear theSUNK,

I always told myself that I would never suck a dick in my life. 

"Its nasty" is what I told myself, but boy was I wrong.
There is nothing wrong with sucking dick.

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A Simple Kiss...

She had just come back to Chicago from school and needed a ride from the train station. We talked about playing one another in Uno(card game). Since I'm the Uno champion we arranged for me to defend my title. When we first got to my boy Fooley's crib we sat down and chatted, I was shuffling the deck like we were betting our houses on this game. I made the game a little more interesting, so I broke out some Pinnacle Whipped Cream Vodka, Boones Farm and Peach Andre; just a sweet light drink. We made a wager. Which was just a simple kiss.
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No Tongs Only a Tongue: Toss Her Salad

http://sirrealphoto.tumblr.com/

Eddie Griffin once said, “How many of ya’ll eat ass? *quiet* Am I the only one? *quiet* How many of ya’ll eat p^ssy? *screams* Ya’ll mothafuckas lying, if ya’ll eat p^ssy right ya’ll gonna slip up on some ass.” The anus is pleasure chest of its own. Once you get past just having sex and into having an experience, you're going to eat her ass. And when you do she's gonna love you for it. Matter of fact she's going to adore you. She's going to tell all her friends about you. They're going to save their money  just to build a statue of you in the heart of whatever city you reside in. If that's not enough here's a few more reasons Why should you toss her salad?:
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MackVice: How Should I Approach This Guy?

One of my readers wants to get busy with a guy that has been around for two years, but doesn't know exactly how to. They've both been vocal about how they've felt, tried once and failed, and neither has since made the first move or really put themselves out there. So she emailed theSUNK for some advice, I gave her something even better, it's called MackVice:
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The XXX-BOX Diaries III: Rock the Boat

I sit bored as I flicked through the channels in my stateroom on my 5^th cruise.

I’m with people who have never been before so they decide to explore the boat—I just wanted to lay down.

I start to think about a friend that I couldn’t wait to explore sexually back at home.

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Have You Heard of "Pearling"?

Recently or rather unfortunately I was perusing these tough and obscure internet streets, I happened to go to one of my favorite adult sites. There I saw a chick engaging in sex with a guy that seemed to have the worse Herpes outbreak in Herpes' illustrious history. However, after further inspection(rewinding and pausing) I realized that it wasn't an STD. It should had been a mental illness, because no man would have done what he did to his penis if he wasn't missing a few screws, bolts, etc. What was it? It was something called "pearling", if you don't know what pearling is maybe you should read this blog.
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Fat Girl Lovin'- 6 Reasons Why Sex with a Fat Girl is Better

Today, we're not going to refer to fat girls as BBW, more-to-love, big girls, plus sized or any of that other sh!t that people other than fat girls deem more politically correct. I f*cking love fat girls. Those proportional fat girls with tanks asses that change the course of the Earth's path around the Sun. Titties so heavy they make bras straps weep on the regular with the groove marks on the shoulders to prove it. Soft, warm and glowing...Flirtatious and freaky than a mothafucka, my d!ck gets hard just thinking about a fat chick I can worship. Here's Fat Girl Lovin'- 6 Reasons Why Sex with a Fat Girl is Better:

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15 Things Good P*ssy Can Do

So it was only a matter of time before 15 Things Good P*ssy Can Do had to be written, actually a year later after 15 Things Good D!ck Can Do. Within that year I've had some good p*ssy however there is also an alarming rate of wack box that inspired 6 Signs You Have Insecure P*ssy, a disease that is plaguing this great American country and even other places in the world. But f*ck it let us not focus on the negatives that suck the morale out of our bedrooms but rather on, 15 Things Good Pussy Can Do:
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5 Everyday Household Items That Can Make You Scream

You're sitting at home hornier than a felon on a 25-year stint. Walking around your house bucket ball naked, thinking of the d!ck that isn't there or was there. You go through your phone and there isn't any d!ck worth texting. What's next? Look for a toy. What if you don't own a toy? Look for a replacement. Here are 5 Everyday Household Items That Can Make You Scream:
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PODCAST: 99% of Women Want a King, But Only 1% Deserve a Ring

Announcement:

Check out the podcast I did with fellow bloggers Wisdom Is Misery J from Up4Dsn IpodKingCarter and Brian Joyner called "REAL MEN DON’T GOSSIP Ep. 1: 99% of Women Want a King, But Only 1% Deserve a Ring"

HEAR theSUNK's Voice for the 1st Time

How Do You Clean Up After Doing the Nasty?

There's only a couple things not good about the best thing in the world- sex. One of those things are cleaning up afterwards. Sometimes you just want to lay in that warm puddle of sex or ignore that warm ejaculant until it dries up like glue residue. However, cleaning up is essential you just can't lay there. Sh!t cleanliness is next to Godliness.
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I Have Needs? No. We Both Have Needs

The sexism card doesn't always work against women; sometimes it works in their favor. So many men in long distance relationships hear the same line from their women time and again: "I know you have needs, so do you, as long as...". As for the notion that women don't have the same needs as men, that sh!t is a copout. Women use this excuse so men don't bring up the same issues of fidelity. Talking bout "You Have Needs". No, We Both Have Needs. 

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How to Make Love in the Movies

Maybe the bedroom has become too boring for you or maybe you want to let your hair down a little and take a risk. Either way here's How to Make Love in the Movies:

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Signs That You May Suffer From Insecure P^ssy

You're beautiful. You have a great job. You're Intelligent. Men go crazy when they see you. When you walk out the house the thirst(attention) is crazy. You have to reject men daily, even hourly. One guy catches your eye though, he's sexy. One thing leads to another. A few days go by, a text here, a phone call there, and next thing you know you all are ripping each others' clothes off. However, he didn't know (Sh!t, you didn't know) you have... insecure p^ssy.
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Do I Owe U Sex?

Once you have s3x with someone for a substantial amount of time, is it your duty to always satisfy their needs?

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So You Wanna Try Anal?

If you let your man do anal, chances are you're really feeling him. Anal is a rare occurrence for the average fornicator. You have some women that only prefer anal and it doesn't matter as much if they let a guy do it, but these women are hard to find. This blog is for you, the beginner, that wants to try anal someday and for the others that cringe at the mere mention of anal. So You Wanna Try Anal?
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You Sleep...

Women, today you will learn the things men hate about sleeping in the bed with you and the reasons he leaves your house after the end of making love beating it up. Not because he has a woman on the side or that he can't stand you. It's because you don't let him relax when it is time to go the f^ck to sleep. Four Things Men Hate About Sharing Their Beds with Women- You Sleep?
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Have You Ever Been D!ckSmacked?

Have You Ever Been D!cksmacked? Have you ever had a big, black heavy d!ck smack you on your lips, cheek, and tongue? Have you ever had a d!ck spanking, whether it was because of your good blow job or your lazy mouth-a-batics skills? A d!cksmack should be merciless, abusing your face with ever ounce of hard d!ck one can muster.
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We Ruined Each Other, Poem

We s^cked and We f^cked so much the moans drowned out the talk.
All we did was joke around on those long walks.
We should've taken each other more serious.
Cute smirks, romantic glances turned to barren advances.
What felt like the beginning of forever, so quickly turned to nothing much at all.
I remember the first time I saw you.
Delicious to a set of eyes that weren't hungry.
A worthy investment for a heart that only lusted money.
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